Tuesday, February 26, 2008

I guess if I had to choose an orifice that would have been the one.

Jessica Simpson and I have a lot in common. We both use Proactiv to control our acne and we both . . . umm . . . Okay, Jessica Simpson and I have one thing in common. I’m a fan of the Proactiv (no unfortunately this is not a paid endorsement) and I find that it works quite well. And yet, as with everything in my life, there is a catch.

You see my skin hates me. It’s almost like it has a mind of its own and it lives to torture me. I like to think of my skin as an angry goddess. Goddess Acnetrius. And for the last few years she and I have been locked in an epic struggle between whiteheads and oil free skin. A battle between oozing pustules and healthy pores.

My skin regime is fairly impenetrable. However, it has its weaknesses and since I can’t apply Proactiv too close to my lips for fear of the benzyl peroxide turning them into strips of fried bacon, I end up getting zits right up against my lip line. Other times they’ll appear right at the hairline or along the jaw and while I’m thankful that I don’t have them all over my face it’s still incredibly annoying.

This week though, during the normal Pre-menstrual siege I was blindsided with a new tactic. A huge pimple inside my ear. I’m not even joking here people. INSIDE MY EAR CANAL. Who knew that was even possible?!

Have you ever tried to pop a throbbing zit inside your ear with a Q tip? Well, unfortunately I have and I can tell you from first hand experience that it’s not a whole lot of fun. Acnetrius, you filthy bitch!

9 comments:

Aunt Becky said...

Oh, I hate those zits. I've had them before, and they're so painful, and then you pop them and it makes this terrible noise.

Ew.

*shudders dramatically*

baseballmom said...

OMG, ear zits hurt the WORST.

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