Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Tha Bomb!

Overheard at work between a white woman in her late 30’s and her very white manager:

"This is Tha Bomb!"


"This spreadsheet that they sent over is the bomb, it’s great! It has all the data we need."

"Oh, . . . cool."

Now I’m not sure of the true origin of the phrase "Tha Bomb" but I’m sure its originator never intended for it to be used to describe a spreadsheet. Besides, the use of such terms really confuses the white folks who have never seen MTV. Therefore I’m contemplating routing the following around the office:

To: All white employees
RE: Proper use of urban slang

It has come to the attention of management that certain urban slang terms are being used in the office inappropriately and are causing confusion amongst the staff. While we encourage the use of culturally diverse language it’s important to consider both your subject matter and your audience.

For example: If your co-worker thinks that Snoop Dogg is a cute nickname for Charlie Brown’s beagle then you may want to refrain from expressing your admiration of his new Lexus by saying, "That is one sweet ride homeboy, I bet you’re rollin’ in the honies!" (translation: That car is really neat. I assume you are able to garner the attention of attractive females with it.)

It’s also good to keep in mind that terms such as; Tha Bomb, Off the Hizzy, Dope, Fly, and Off the Hook should not be used to refer to data, spreadsheets, your new split screen monitor, the fancy new purple highlighters in supply or the new fax machine, nor should these terms be used by anyone who wears or has ever worn the following: Dockers, penny loafers, a sweater vest or any clothing item purchased at JC Penny.

Thank you for your cooperation and if you should have any further questions regarding the correct usage of urban slang, please contact Human Resources to check out the company video, "Shizzle your Cubizzle; Appropriate Use of Slang in the Corporate Environment" featuring Rob VanWinkle (fka Vanilla Ice).

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